I am silly, shocked and sad

How would you feel if you,

woke up so early in the freezing foggy morning,
caught the sandwich-cramming train,
had to wait for another train with the chilly wind blowing in your face every second,
stood and sat in the cold train for approximately two blardy hours,

And alas, you managed to reach the work place on time,

Only to find out that the officer in New York was on leave and didn't manage to process your employment letter last week, which thus withhold you from start working this week, and having to wait for another blardy week - jobless, before you get to start the blardy job next week?

And can't the Ludwig Institute human resource manager give me a ring on friday to tell me this 'essential' information so that I could make a good planning on what I could do during my this entire *off-week* ??????

*S I G H*

Today is a silly, shocking and sad day.

Oh well, I should be happy to get a week holiday before I start the new job, but I feel silly, shocked and sad.

Went groceries shopping and cooked myself a good yummy meal.

Being misunderstood?

Isit alright,
to be misunderstood by everyone
as long as you know what is happening?

Isit worth it,
to be misunderstood by everyone
as long as you feel you are fine?

Isit long-lasting,
to be misunderstood by everyone
as long as you are determined with how you feel?

Isit possible,
to not think so much and
get stuffed with everything?
to not care so much and
can't be bothered with everything?

Please tell me if it is.

Alas...

I am glad,
that everything is back to normal for me
that everything is clear and understood
that nothing further will be developed
that nobody later will be hurt, even more

I am glad.

Tiredness.....

Haven't had a decent break from...

Studying at University
Waitressing at Chillipadi
Researching at the STRIP

Yet gonna have to be prepared for...

Research assistant at Ludwig Institute...next week

Gonna faint soon.

Tong Hua

wang le you duo jiu
zai mei ting dao ni
dui wo shuo ni zui ai de gu shi
wo xiang le hen jiu
wo kai shi huang le
shi bu shi wo you zuo cuo le shen me

# ni ku zher dui wo shuo
tong hua li du shi pian ren de
wo bu ke neng shi ni de wang zi
ye xu ni bu hui dong
cong ni shuo ai wo yi hou
wo de tian kong xing xing dou liang le

*wo yuan bian cheng tong hua li
ni ai de na ge tian shi
zhang kai shuang shou
bian cheng chi bang shou hu ni
ni yao xiang xin
xiang xin wo men hui xiang tong hua gu shi li
xin fu he kuai le shi jie ju

# ni ku zher dui wo shuo
tong hua li du shi pian ren de
wo bu ke neng shi ni de wang zi
ye xu ni bu hui dong
cong ni shuo ai wo yi hou
wo de tian kong xing xing dou liang le

*wo yuen bian cheng tong hua li
ni ai de na ge tian shi
zhang kai shuang shou
bian cheng chi bang shou hu ni
ni yao xiang xin
xiang xin wo men hui xiang tong hua gu shi li
xin fu he kuai le shi jie ju (x2)

wo hui bian cheng tong hua li
ni ai de na ge tian shi
zhang kai shuang shou
bian cheng chi bang shou hu ni
ni yao xiang xin
xiang xin wo men hui xiang tong hua gu shi li
xin fu he kuai le shi jie ju

yi qi xie wo men de jie ju

Is love that complicated?

I used to, and still believe,

that Love is about,

abundance
completeness
energy
eternal
generousity
maturity
power
sacrifaction
response
undivideness

Love is Allness

Now I have an alternate view of Love:

To love is suffering
Be loved is torturing

If there is no response

Family chat

Talked to papa
Talked to mama
Talked to popo
Talked to ta cia
Talked to er cia

Everyone has a problem....a matter of discussion and solving it together....or waiting for it to dissolve.....which is impossible

Had a happy and homely chat~

I am a stupid girl

1. I was asked to apply for the mid-year PhD scholarship.
2. I applied for a job and went for the interview, in which I told the interviewers that I am going to apply for a PhD scholarship.
3. I told my supervisor that I am going home for holiday just to give myself a break from the tiring, no-salary and no-experience-gained work.
4. The interviewer called up my ex-supervisor and asked her to assure him that I shall not take up the PhD scholarship if I were to be employed. My supervisor, who is a "straight-forward" lady, told the interviewer off.
5. I am stuck in between, only having to wait for "any" phone calls.
6. I am emotionally influenced by some people.
7. I took a wrong train home today for being dreamy, and only to realise my "off-track" after half an hour in the Sydneham line train...took me two blardy hours to reach home.
8. I was being inspected twice for train tickets in the wrong train, but fortunately I was a good girl who bought my daily full fare ticket.

I feel like a dummy girl.......

fReEE-biRd

Today was my last day in the STRIP building 75, last day having to do heaps of immunofluorescence staining and tissue culture, last day having to feel saturated and highly expected, last day having to feel frustrated and attached.....until i am contented with my hiding.

I feel relaxed.