Wednesday, January 05, 2005

Happy New Year!

My last posting was before christmas, and now it is exactly the fifth day of the year 2005. No exciting nor new year's feeling, happy or sensational feeling just yet. Except, a little bit of confusion, loneliness, frustrated and unstable emotions was felt, is feeling and would be feeling.
My new year resolution? If I am not mistaken, have made several exciting resolutions and ambitions that might perhaps be achievable and would definitely try to achieve them. But mind has become a little blank and lost right now. Perhaps should have written down in my diary all the resolutions that I have made for myself, or thought of, so that I could then pursue them. Hopefully my memory will return eventually and without being too late for me to achieve them.
Aims and decisions change everyday, every minute and every second. MAKE UP YOUR MIND! But I just cannot do that. I am so indecisive, unfocussed, greedy, unprofessional in managing my life. What would I want for my future? What could I be in my future? What would be best for my future? Whether I really wanted them and that they are the best for me, that is another question. That's a nobody's say. Not even myself....because nobody could do what they wanted to do and loved what they did, liked what they are doing and know that they wuld love what they would be doing in the future. Could someone or something please prove me wrong?? Please.......................

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